2 weekends ago, a team went to Tanjong Pinang and conducted a
first-ever adventure camp for an orphanage. I was told to share about the camp, but what
about? We have pulled it off like many other events did before, and the camp
definitely left a sweet aftertaste to have had that opportunity to partner God
and to do something good. So when I was told to share, I wondered, apart from
the typical things, what did God want to convey to the congregation through the
Tanjong Pinang ministry.
Coincidentally a week ago, I got a Facebook notification showing
this photo. Facebook told me that it’s been 4 years since it has been taken. I
have lost track, but 4 years is a long time, and the ministry which I’ve first
joined back in 2011 has undergone much changes, and many more challenges.
Most of the time the journey was filled with doubts because frankly,
fruits were few and far between. Every year we meet to discuss the way forward,
I always asked, what’s the point? Being the impatient me, I wanted to do
something more dramatic, more promising, and basically bigger, but each year
went by like a meandering stream. I went through short periods of exile lasting
up to half a year, but always got drawn back to this ministry. Over the years,
we saw all kinds of servers- people who came to see-see-look-look, people who
came to “gain experiences”, people who came to “contribute” etc. 4 years went
by, many people joined and many people left, but the few who stayed were not
the most qualified by any measures.
Over the 4 years, I’ve taken away much, and the one lesson that tops
it off is this: God’s will and its fulfillment do not and will never rely on
men. Regardless of the presence or absence of good plans, good people, good
talents, or even good intentions, God is the only One who is capable of
bringing to fruition His good plans for humanity. So 3 years back we’ve had an
outdoor activity for Sonshine kids; 2 years ago we’ve had a Christmas
evangelistic program; last year we’ve had a barbecue fellowship, and this year
an adventure camp for the children from the orphanage. If God were to be taken
out of any of the abovementioned, none of these that we’ve been a part of would
have been fulfilled.
Yet, even in the difficult times, when long planning and hard works
were put into place, and yet results do not show, we’ve learnt the bittersweet.
About half a year ago, we conducted a parenting talk, and the turnout was a
miserable 4 or 5 mothers. These are the things on the field which we do not
hear about, because the lauding crowd loves successful story. Yet, at the point
of writing, countless missionaries had to be evicted from Great Britain because
their licenses were being revoked. And in view of these, it’s easy to question
God if perhaps we might have heard wrongly; or that if this is an indication
from God for a closed door.
I will not hesitate to tell you, in my 4 years of serving on the
field, countless times I’ve talked to my sister about the ministry. If a good
tree bears good fruits, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruits, then does not
seeing fruits definitely mean that the efforts, time and money we have sown
were in vain? Martha Myers and Jim Elliot were respectively killed on the very
mission fields they were sent to, Adoniram Judson was first denied access to India;
and then waited for 6 long years before he had the joy to lead someone to
Christ in Burma. God’s timing is not the way we understand things to be,
neither is His way.
At the beginning of this year when I proposed to hold a camp for the
orphanage, with every good intention of wanting to equip the group of local
youths whom we have been walking alongside for 2 years, I was only hoping that
these youths would understand why we were doing what we did, month in month
out. I was hoping to inspire a small group of youths to step up in their walk
with God to become the light in this part of the world. So we went about
sounding out that possibility.
Months went by, and there were a lot more dread than anything else because
it was taking up so much from all of us. We were exhausted and expanded, in
terms of energy and time. So if I were to tell you about how faithful or how
committed the team had been, I would have been lying. We were a bunch of
disgruntled servers, and my favorites words during this period were “I’ll never
do this again”.
Coming through this, I remain thankful to these very people who
stuck by, disgruntled or not. Amongst the 5 youths, only 3 came, but God
brought into our midst 6 others from a local church. Even when we realized that
we overestimated our planning midway through the program; even when I wandered
halfway if apart from fun, joy and laughter, the kids were even getting the
message that I was trying to convey. See, it takes a lot of conviction, and I
could not even muster faith the size of a mustard seed in those moments. God was
the One who remained faithful through it all, and all we did was to continually
doubt, question and then lean onto God, while moving things along.
See. It’s tough works. We continue to sow seeds, and before the
seeds bear fruits, John 12:24 says the seeds first fall to the ground and die
before it can bear much fruits. It is never self-serving, and if we say we are
stewarding God’s people, we don’t pick and drop them as and when it is
convenient to do so. Therefore, I invite you to come along with us on this
journey with Christ, to continue to trust Him and lay before Him the little
that we have.
