Moving Ahead, By Myself (God and me)

Whenever something exciting takes shape in my imagination, I always have the urge to share with others about these ingenious ideas. Many times I set off in hope of rallying some excited souls to come alongside, to take on these challenges; and many times I ended up frustrated and disappointed.

I don't know if I had come off wanting these friends to be refreshed in their minds and souls, like how Christians go around shoving gospels in the faces of their unbelieving loved ones. OR perhaps, rallying had really been a perfect guise to hide my own incompetency, my own fear of commitment, and to find a cushion to diffuse responsibility. Isn't that how social support works- when you feel like stopping, you can rely on these people to keep you moving. 

I have no qualms about sharing the testimonies, especially the Gospel. After all in a huge portion of my early faith, I always boldly declared that "things are so good, and we can't help but to share it with our friends", and then I would proceed with quoting many biblical examples about how those handicapped ones rejoiced, how the women by the well told everyone, and even how Joseph boasted about his dreams to his brothers. Good things are to be shared, and there is something special that happens not just to the audience, but the person who shares during this process...

BUT today, I'm pulling a halt to the conviction. My conviction still stands, but I'm also beginning to recognize the flaw. What appears to be may not be what it really is. My own words are coming back at me. Rather than blaming God for a lack of companions, I have been guilty of being a disappointment too. Right now looking back at those times when I got two good friends to come along with me to do the simple blessing project, but ended up being frustrated and annoyed by their lackluster posture... What if I have been guilty of that as well...

Some things, we just have to do it alone (with God), and my rallying should fall back onto that same principle once more. Lest I am secured in God; lest I am satisfied in God, everyone else wouldn't. 

Therefore this time round, I'm moving ahead, by myself (God and me)!