Holy discontent

Daddy, 
I quietly lift the veil that hides You from me, only to realize that I have always been the one who had let the veil down. Your desire for me to run to You, Lord, is so great! There may have been moments where I question and ask, those moments when I doubt, Lord, You have looked beyond all these and kept Your eyes on me.
Right now, I do not know where I stand, even that heart that always waver and shake, Lord, You have kept me close, and I am just so thankful! This season of closeness and intimacy, Lord, let it not be a cause for complacency, but maintain that Holy discontent within me! Each day, I look to You, to hear You, to see You, and to find You, but Lord let those not become routined motions to go through. Sustain that yearning within me, and help me to always exclaim a blessing to Your name! 
Lord, I thank You for those insights! Sometimes, my disbelief and logic create a barrier. But on hindsight now, I just wanna give You praise and thanks, and acknowledge that these are indeed from You.
I wanna remember Schultz's saying about You being able to do more with our mistakes than with our own efforts to obey You. All these point to a reliance on You, and a huge trust in Daddy! So Daddy, I pray for You to help my disbelief! Help me to keep my eyes fixed on You.
Also, Daddy, as I began to avail myself more and more, I trust in Your provision that indeed You will help to meet whatever's required in accomplishing the works. Give me the rest that I can only find in You, and help me to manage the things at hands, that indeed all these will come together for the good of those who loves You! Unless we rely on You, we can do nothing; and unless the house is built in You, the builders labor in vain. So I commit all these works into Your mighty and powerful hands! Thank You Daddy in Christ's name!

Your child,

Judah

A swing of the shovel;
a glance I look over.
soil splatters; heart shatters.
the scar of the hurt stays beyond the years gone by;
the scar in Your palm, ways which point to a love I would gladly rely.


Psalm 127: 1
"Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain."